you attention and/or genital touching simply because you're noble enough to refrain from being an abusive dick-monster. We don't like it and we will continue to complain about it, but we can deal with it.
It's shitty to tell women that they're incompetent at handling their own lives, simply because their life choices don't include handling your genitals. I'd prefer for guys NOT to randomly approach me..ever. So if our discomfort is not enough to get you to stop, then please understand that this dating-strategery-PUA-advice-coaching-sorcery shit is harming you (almost) as much as it's harming us.
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If you are considering looking at the results of this poll and then incorporating that information into your dating life, or if you are considering hiring Adam Lo Dolce (or Patti Stanger or Mystery or Commodore Flip-Flap or —women have been dealing with this shit for decades.
It does not matter what you look like, particularly. It's intangible and surprising and there is no formula. That is a very human, very relatable, and very sympathetic impulse.
It does not matter whether or not you are wearing a begoggled furry top hat or carrying the fingerbones of a drowned widow in your boot or sacrificing a golden hind to Ares every morning. But, unfortunately, dating coaches aren't real wizards, they're sideshow charlatans peddling cheap tricks. The problem is that these techniques are ineffective and . Aside from the handful of outliers that I'm sure exist out there, at the end of this process, you will most likely wind up equally alone but with less money. There's a cruel adage that goes, "It's not sexual harassment if you're hot." As in, nobody minds getting hit on by someone that they're actually attracted to—it's only the unwanted advances that are offensive. I am thrilled to have a conversation with , as long as that "conversation" isn't built on dehumanizing and commodifying me.
Love and loneliness are terrifying—I am personally familiar with that terror—and the world is full of people who want to capitalize on the desperation of the insecure. And that's the problem with most "dating advice"—pre-engineered "strategies" strip women of their personhood by default.
They treat a woman's brain like it's just her vagina's doorman. It's always nice to get a compliment but my initial reaction when guys do this is kthxbai!
And I am repulsed by pretty much anyone, at any time of day, no matter how hot they are, who talks to my vagina instead of my brain. The only dudes who are capable of pulling off PUA tricks are the ones who don't need them. Even if you could learn to pull it off, you don't need to be a smarmy charm-genie to get people to like you. I mean, obviously not all of us hate it—women are not monolithic (which, again, is why you cannot trick women into fucking you using any kind of a "system"!!! I'm always in a hurry and generally speaking the average guy who walks up to me is not going to have a lot in common with me.. If someone rejects you, it probably doesn't reflect on you —because a woman is a person and people are friends with each other.
The reason PUA shit works for PUA coaches is because they're great actors—they've mastered the art of disguising that commodification as genuine interest. Smart people can see through that garbage anyway, and it will make them hate you.2. When you hit on us simply because we are pretty, it confirms our fears that when we stop being pretty we will become garbage and the world will throw us away. You know how invisible you feel when a woman isn't interested in you? It is not our responsibility to validate your humanity with our vaginas, especially when you refuse to validate ours. But you don't need a dating coach to teach you this.
That's how a lot of women feel in situations that are not sexual transactions. And it's hard for us to get boners for you when we are busy feeling sad. It sets you up to blame women for your own loneliness. Women are not obligated to like you because you are "nice" to them, and the implication that they are is, in fact, the opposite of "nice." 4. If this is a serious issue for you—if you really and truly are coming across as repellant to the women you're hitting on—your money might be better invested in therapy. Even the oiliest dating coach and I can agree on this—confidence is a major factor in attraction. There are two ways to not take rejection personally: You can be the kind of person who recognizes and forgives other people's completely mysterious and bizarre agency and circumstances, and understands that strangers' lives have nothing to do with you.
(Sidenote: Remember that we might not end up getting boners for you either way, because we are people. But you don't get confidence from cheap tricks, you get it from dealing with your shit. Don't just spray cologne on it and expect women not to notice that shit is shit. Remember the part about how women want to be talked to like human beings? you can be the kind of person who doesn't take things personally because a dating coach taught you that women are just statistics—just numbers—and a certain number of them are going to reject you.